Loosing a pound makes my day, gaining one makes me wanna kill myself.
I don't promote any kind of self harm, or eating disorder. It's just my blog, my own diary to express myself.
kik given in private if needed
30. September 2014

hey guys, i’m sorry i haven’t been around much for the past few month. The thing is… I started to recover and i think that tumblr can be very triggering. So in order to get better i just had to stop coming here because it always made me feel bad.

I don’t think i’ll be posting around much anymore but i’ll keep my account online so that you can still message if you have a question or anything:)

I love you all, i hope you’re okay, sincerely xx

3-am-sadness:

I hate getting in these weird moods where I’m just randomly depressed and nothing feels right.

"My brother killed himself
on the twenty-eighth Thursday of last year
and I missed four days of work
and my mom wanted to know ‘Why’.
My brother
he was always a fan of beauty
but what he did
was not beautiful at all.

And last week I got the news
that one of my good friends from high school
had overdosed
(again)
except this time
she’d gone too far
and now she was gone.
And I had a hard time falling asleep at night
and her mother
hugged me tight
and thanked me for coming to the service
but I did not
want to be there at all.
This is not
beautiful.

The girl down the street
would’ve turned 21 last year
and I can scarcely imagine
the wild times she would’ve
(should’ve)
had.
But she is buried six feet deep
after falling nearly 300
and she did not leave a note.
This is not
beautiful.

My freshman year of college
and my roommate was beautiful
and how I wanted to be just like her.
But she wore herself down
till she was
almost invisible
and if you blinked
you had to go and find her all over again.
So now her parents are no longer supporting her college tuition
but are paying her hospital bills
watching their daughter crumble.
This is not
beautiful.

So y’all can take your narcissistic
romanticizing
and glamorizing
of self harm and eating disorders and committing suicide
and shove them as far up your ass
as you possibly can.
Starvation is not beautiful.
Killing yourself is not beautiful.
Sadness
is not beautiful.
This note I am writing
is not beautiful.

But you
you are beautiful
and it’s about damn time you start believing it.

"


(via runiqu)

(via nudely)

Anonymous: I wanted to kill myself at 14. Sadly I can't get suicide off my brain. I want to die thin though. Haha I'm weird

Ive been suicidal for a long time you know. Then my depression turned into anorexia, and everything became complicated.. But today, I’m not suicidal anymore, and almost cured from anorexia! Prove that there’s hope for everyone :)
I don’t think you’re weird sweetie, I think you have an illness, an illness that is hard to cure but possible to cure too.
Take care of you and try to talk about this to people you trust or maybe doctors or Psychologue… I know it helped me A LOT! xxx